I can honestly say that our marriage has not been a complicated one. From the time I knew that I was in love with my husband (like, a good ten years ago!), I knew that, one day, we’d be together and we’d be able to weather any test or trial of faith that came our way. After being together “officially” for two years, being married for two going three years, and welcoming a new life in the form of our son, I’d say our life has been very, very blessed. Here’s why:
1. We have always had more than enough. I don’t mean to say we’re rich or swimming in cash (not that I wouldn’t mind it, hehe!). We live comfortably in a lifestyle that marries our respective paychecks. We’ve never had a week when groceries or food was a problem, we’ve always had a roof over our heads, we’ve never lacked in clothing, nor have we had to deal with excess and extravagance. Our life, though simple, is right and real for us. We are amply supplied, and I know it is because we have a good God watching over us.
2. We’ve never had a major fight. Sure, we’ve had our misunderstandings. But these last but a few minutes, and at worst, an hour or so. We’ve never “let the sun go down on anger,” as we were raised to believe that all disagreements, disappointments and arguments–whatever their causes–needed to be resolved before the clock struck midnight. We’ve never fought about money, which I believe is a true test of marriage, as statistically, issues involving money are prime factors in why many marriages fail. We’ve not had dramatic tirades, emo episodes, “pity parties,” and such. This is an aspect I’m most proud of.
3. We remember to “date” each other. When we were single, dates were more lavish. Now that we’re married with a kid and a household to manage, we have to make a deliberate effort to still “date” each other. Whether it’s at a white-tablecloth resto or over a simple meal of pizza and beer, our dates are throwbacks to our single days when we were going steady, but now infused with that mysterious brand of love that only marriage brings. I look forward to these dates immensely.
4. We are the real versions of who we are. I love how, no matter how I look or feel, I know my husband still adores me. And vice-versa. Don’t get me wrong; we’re not sugary-sweet 24/7. We both work from home and are together all the time, which means that we’re often witnesses to each other’s best and worst of times. We can show our true colors to each other without feeling judgmental. We challenge each other to bring out the best versions of ourselves, be it health-wise, looks-wise, emotionally, spiritually. I’m grateful that my husband is a man who believes in authenticity. He’s not pretentious, he isn’t swayed by trends, and he’s adamant about his convictions: All great qualities, all reasons why I knew I’d married well.
5. Our faith governs our marriage. This is paramount. The reason why our marriage, though still young and somewhat new, succeeds. Faith–in God, in each other–helps us to see beyond our current circumstances, be they good or not-too-good.
What makes your marriage successful?